And the name 'Erin' wasn't a clue?:p
Originally Posted by Snak3
Erin, let me make a few constructive criticisms of the actual content on your site, as you have received plenty of useful suggestions for seo and marketing already.
In you 'what makes me so special' section, where I am concentrating, the first thing I want to point out is the use of the phrase 'what makes me so special'.
Remember, your clients are primarily interested in one thing: themselves; and not you.
Don't sell yourself solely as you; sell yourself as your value to the client.
A more appropriate heading would be: what makes my services more valuable to you. (sell the value of your services to the client, not your opinions of yourself; they can get that free all day)
Have you met most of your competition?
1. Unlike most of my competition, I spent years in the retail trenches, learning sales the hard way. I know how to sell to real people–people who are cautious about spending money in a terrible economy.
What is it they do which you don't?
Telling me that you spent 'years in the retail trenches' is the equivalent of telling me that you worked at Kmart; and that doesn't impress me.
Try something along these lines:
What distinguishes my services among many competent in this field is years learning sales the tried and true way: person to person. My ability to communicate effectively with people is something I am able to put into writing, and this translates into professionalism and customers for you.
*Don't speak down about your competition; actually build them up, then sell what you have to offer above that. Leave the 'retail' out of sales. Don't mention the economy; it has become an overused catchphrase, and cliches and catchphrases are poor selling points.
My theater background allows me to be as flamboyant or as down to earth as you need. If you want to “dress up” your content or copy, I can do that without turning it into the drag queen of your world.
With a background in theatre and drama, your content can be as dressed up or down to Earth as you desire; without turning it into written histrionics.
*At this point, use a language which already makes the copy belong to the reader: 'your content'. You don't have to sell something they already own.
Seriously try to avoid language like comparing content to drag queens; I am turned off by that and others may take offense to it. Don't use stereotypes in your sales copy.
Also try to avoid starting so many sentences with 'I' and 'my'. Unfortunately, employers and clients alike don't want to look at people as people, but as third person services.
I truly love writing and marketing. I often get a little carried away with “you should try this!” suggestions, and I’m quick to share my ideas which means that you get my years of marketing, writing and selling expertise for free!
Writing, marketing and sales are passions for me. I excel in these areas with many years of experience behind me, which means effectively communicating ideas to your customers (*or readers), which benefit you.
*Take the ownership away from you and give it to your client; don't communicate your ideas to their customers, but ideas in general.
"you should try this!" suggestions is something anybody can do and is just rambling in your copy, effectively not appealing to your potential client.
Sell yourself by:
1) Making the product belong to the client.
2) By being positive and pointing out your strengths, not anybody else's perceived weaknesses.
3) Don't oversell. Too much selling gives the client the opportunity to ask questions; questions are doubts and being that you are not there to handle those doubts you will lose potential clients that way.
4) Don't sell what you want to sell but what a potential client wants to buy. It is easy to get into a habit of being a used car salesman (my apologies to used car salesmen everywhere:rolleyes:).
5) Provide useful answers up front, and respectfully; what you answer up front is something you don't have to answer later, and, in a sales sense, makes for a more effective close.
Just some suggestions. The copy I have provided are just examples and not intended to be cut and paste. If something is useful to you, reword it into something you would be comfortable saying (i.e. make it yours).