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Thread: 2012 Olympics

  1. #1

    2012 Olympics

    Well, the games are in progress. Might as well have a spot to discuss them. Here's a rundown on a few of the events and/or related controversies thus far.

    OPENING CEREMONIES
    Opening ceremonies were rather bizarre. Started out celebrating turning a beautiful pastoral setting into an industrial wasteland {progress?}... then sorta evolved into a surreal joint nightmare in a children's mental ward. That was followed by a love story that had something to do with a telephone. In the end they celebrated the Brit healthcare system, which apparently kills surprisingly fewer people than many others or something... they weren't clear about it.

    The scope was grand, like WWII set to music, but I think there were some serious hallucinogens involved in drafting the script.

    NO PRESSURE, MIKE
    Meanwhile the NBC announcers made a lot of the idea that all Michael Phelps had to do was win three more gold medals to become the most decorated Olympian in history. Piece-o-cake. Just go beat the best athlete in every country in the world {some of whom may or may not have been force fed steroids intended for horses for the last four years}. Do it three times. No pressure... We'll wait here while ya do it and say nasty stuff about you every time you don't succeed at it.

    My question is how many gold medals the guys saying that stuff have to their names. What dorks.

    CHANGING ATTIRE {no relation to changing a tire}
    The swimmers have lost the full body suits this year, apparently they were deemed to have flotation qualities that made them illegal... or maybe they were needed to cover up the female volleyball players.

    Our team looked resplendent in French berets worn in England, made in China, advertising team USA. Not sure if the drab gray hoodies involved were a political statement, but if they were it went over my head.

    Cheating to win
    There's a 5'8 Chinese swimmer that's being watched carefully to see if she eats food or is just oiled and carefully disassembled and stored in a crate after the games. Apparently despite her relatively diminutive size she's swimming faster than her male counterparts and several species of salmon.

    Suggested explanations have included:

    • -- {a} a strenuous workout regimen
    • -- {b} doping
    • -- {c} genetic engineering
    • -- {d} one helluva costume disguising fact she's really a dolphin

    So far NO evidence of any of the above except for option {a}.

    Cheating to LOSE??

    Yes, they actually disqualified a few badminton teams for intentionally losing. Apparently the plan was to get into the re passage tier where they'd have a better chance of playing against others that lost.

    TURNOUT
    The 2012 games are being observed by possibly the largest gathering of empty chairs since Ricky Nelson played Madison Square Garden. Ideas for filling the chairs include recruiting everyone at NBC who has suggested Michael Phelps only needs three more gold medals to make history.

    -------------

    Are you watching the games this year?
    -- Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup. --

  2. #2
    I didn't watch it yet because the downloads are too large Maybe I will watch the YouTube videos of the best action afterwards?

    I think that the women swimmers should wear the same swim wear as the men, unless of course they are doing backstroke.

    I guess that the tickets for the empty seats were laundered away to speculators who traded them online among each other with the final price being too high for regular punters to afford?

  3. #3
    2012 olympics is really exciting all country are really competitive and i love it.

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